Yoga Dog of Big City Canada

Once again, not a bad practice this morning. It appears that my dread and anticipation of getting on the mat is far more traumatic than the act itself. Silly brain! *eyeroll*

I'm continuing to work on my Intermediate poses, with modifications for my shoulder injury. Here's the rundown:

Pasasana: I can bind on the left side, but not the right (I'm limited in the same way in Marichyasana). I've been 'doing my best' on the bad side, which means working within the limitations of the injury.

Krounchasana: The left side of this pose is the last hold-out for my gimpy hamstring - it hurts. I'm able to come into the pose with care, but it's not deep. The right side is fine, though, full expression.

Shalabasana: Terrific and easy! Thank you, Mr. Choudhury :-)

Bhekasana: It's out of the question right now. That particular rotation of the shoulder triggers the pain of my injury precisely. Even doing one side at a time is painful. Instead, I'm doing Supta Virasana to stretch out my quads.

Dhanurasana: This is another pose that has benefited from Mr. Choudhury's yoga regime. Parva Dhanurasana aggravates the injury, though (I re-injured my shoulder about a month ago rolling over to the right) so I'm not re-adding it until I'm fully recovered.

Ustrasana: Pure joy! I can clearly remember a time when I hated this pose, but now it's a high point. My favourite part is the hang back, when I can feel my legs working.

Laghu Vajrasana: I'm making steady progress. I lost some ground during the early days of the injury, but I'm getting stronger now. Good thing I'm having fun with this one, because I'm stuck here for the foreseeable future.

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I gave the Princess her Spring Fur Makeover on the weekend. The weather is warming up, so I felt a bit more confident cutting off 3 inches of hair from her body. It was a bit like shearing a sheep!


Do I detect an accusing stare?

The new haircut is in preparation for Princess Fur's exciting new project! She will soon begin filming the pilot episode of her new reality television series: "Yoga Dog of Big City Canada".

*throatclearing*

'Yoga Dog of Big City Canada' takes us inside the daily routines and dramas of Princess Fur, a miniature schnauzer with a passion for walkies, frequent naps and Greenies. A cold, drab, Canadian city forms a glamourous backdrop for the day-to-day adventures of our dynamic canine and her grumpy human companion, the Reluctant Ashtangi.

Follow Princess Fur's journey of self-discovery as she sleeps through the Primary Series, walks on the Ashtangi's Manduka mat without permission and begs for breakfast while her human companion is trying to 'take rest'.

This show will TRANSFORM LIVES, people!

No doubt her wardrobe will need to include eensie-weensie-tiny yoga shorts. Do they make these for dogs?

Stay tuned!

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The Gong Show

The week's practices have been the usual mix of hot yoga and Astanga. On Wednesday, I attended Peanut's class at Hot Central. I've adopted a new 'spot' in that room, near the upper left corner in the front row. Yeah, I'm in the front row now. I'm no 'Birkam Rock Star' but I decided that I like being able to spot for alignment in the front mirror. Also, it's less important to me now to be able to see my backbends in a mirror behind me - in fact, that was becoming a bit of a crutch.

The pose I'm working on the most in hot classes these days is Dandayamana-Janushirasana (standing head-to-knee). Today, for the first time, I was able to bring my forehead to my shin and balance there for a few seconds - on both sides! It's still a work-in-progress, but the skill set is readily transferring to my Astanga practice - Uttita Hasta Padangusthasana has never been so stable!

I brought my knee to my shoulder again in Pavanamuktasana. It's really not on the shoulder per se, but more on the front of the armpit-crease. In Astanga, students often hope to hear a 'Good!' from the teacher. These Bikram teachers like adjectives! As Peanut strolled by in Pavanamuktasana, he said "Beautiful, Kai!" and I got that warm, 'the-teacher-thinks-I'm-doing-well' heart-glow. I've said it before, but praise makes me work harder. I think that's why I always do so well in Peanut's class. He's very generous with feedback and he's good at pushing me in a way that's encouraging instead of defeating.

Thanks, boss! *grin*

On Thursday, I dove back into my Astanga practice, full Primary plus my Intermediate. After the futzy practice on Tuesday, I was determined to keep my focus. My vinyasas are still very 'bare bone'. I've been keeping myself inspired by maximising what I *can* do within the limitations of my gimpy shoulder. So I'm doing Chaturanga to the floor, into Upward Facing Dog, back to the floor, then doing a push-up to Chaturanga before coming to table pose and crawling (*sigh*) to the front of my mat for the next pose. It probably looks pretty dumb, but at least I'm building strength.

On Friday, I headed back to Hot Central for the Friday class. I'm starting to LOVE this class! It's one of the most entertaining yoga experiences ever! It's never difficult to 'get a spot' because all the regulars populate the front row and there are not too many of us. The last two rows are usually PACKED, usually with newbies or relative newbies. It's a community class so it's the perfect one to drag a reluctant friend to because it's only five bucks.

The class begins and the front row smoothly moves through the postures, while all hell breaks loose in last two rows. It's like 'The Gong Show' back there! People are whispering, falling over, sitting down abruptly, guzzling water, knocking over their waterbottles, playing with their towels and generally flailing around. I'm NEVER bored and since no one's going to 'bad lady' me about my Driste, once I get into a pose I happily watch the chaos break out behind me from the front mirror (balancing poses are my absolute favourite). It's better than reality television (and I understand Mr. Choudhury is on top of that idea too!).

Pine Nut wasn't there this time, Macadamia was covering. I haven't been to one of her classes in a couple of weeks. She usually runs overtime, but I don't care on a Friday because I'm just going home afterward. I had a great moment in Padangustasana (toe stand), balancing with my hands together for the duration, both sides. Then I totally fell on my bum at the end of the second side and cracked up. See? The front row can be entertaining too! :-D

This morning (Saturday), I just did the Primary Series. I'm going to stick to Primary on Saturdays from now on because I'm doing a lot of yoga back-to-back and I'm always tired because I seem to get to bed late on Fridays.

The shoulder felt sore today - I couldn't do Urdhva Dhanurasana, so I came up on my head instead and focused on working my legs. A few hours after practice, I started playing around with some hangbacks and I'm wondering if they might be a vible alternative to UD as I'm waiting for this shoulder injury to heal. They felt GREAT.





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Intention, meet Action!

Last week in one of my youth classes, a new student arrived - a little boy. He's around six years old. He asked if he *had* to take his shoes off. I confirmed that he must, so he carefully removed them, then unrolled the mat I gave him and sat down, cross-legged.

He looked me in the eye and said, very earnestly: "I'd like to learn how to fart in my own face."

I've never had a student more clearly state their intention for taking yoga practice.

Without skipping a beat, I replied: "Well, yoga can help you with that!" And I got him started on preparatory poses for Tittibhasana B.








(photo credit: Arjuna's wonderful website Ashtangayoga.info)

I'm sure DR and Miss Stan will be happy to know that the yoga mats they donated to my childrens' yoga programme are being put to such GREAT use, helping the next generation of Ashtangis to develop *ahem* important life skills!

;-D

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The end of week always feels very 'yoga-heavy' to me because I go to Pine Nut's Friday night hot class and go to bed almost immediately after coming home. Then I get up the next morning to do my Astanga practice. Yoga, yoga!

Last night's class was fun! As usual, the room was incredibly hot. These Friday night classes are very different from the morning classes I'm used to attending. The room is packed and there's a jolly atmosphere, like someone's having a party.

That 'someone' is Pine Nut, the teacher. His dialogue is energetic and fun and he keeps us all laughing. The sheer mass of people gives the room a bright, intense energy. And there are always a good number of brand new people which is SO MUCH FUN to watch and listen to. Hilarious!

Oh, and by the way, I'm not the only one bestowing nicknames at Hot Central. Actually, there seems to be a culture of nicknames in the hot yoga world (during teacher training, Bikram himself called poor Peanut "Bald Man"...lol).

My nickname appears to be...wait for it..."Miss Astanga".

Yo! REPRESENT!

I think I'm going to get one of those big ribbons to put across my chest - you know, the kind "Miss Universe" wears. :-D

I expected to have a difficult practice last night because it was SO hot, but I didn't. In fact, I had a terrific practice and nailed every single pose. All of my balances were solid, I brought my forehead to my knee in Dandayamana-Janusirsasana on both sides (first time!) and I held toe-stand on both sides.

Contrast this to last Wednesday's class, when the room was a more moderate temperature, yet I was suffering throughout the entire class. I always assumed my good and bad days in the hot room could be explained by temperature fluctuations. Turns out, just like in my Astanga practice, they're really influenced by ME (and, more than likely, my silly brain).

Good to know!

I really enjoyed my Astanga practice this morning. I moved through my Primary and 8 Intermediate poses, futz-free in 75 minutes. This still amazes me. I can still remember last summer when I couldn't get through Primary in under 90 minutes and it was sometimes nearly two hours.

My shoulder felt better today. No pain at all! (but I was backing well away from any transition that caused discomfort).

The highlight of my practice today was Sirsasana. I'm feeling strong in that pose and I think I may be ready to start extending my hold to a couple of minutes again.









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Astanga Limbo

It seems to be 'existential angst' week in the Cybershala. Meanwhile, always lagging a bit behind the herd, I'm happily plugging along with my practice, such as it is, happy as a clam.

This morning, as I rolled up the Manduka after doing my practice, I thought: "I like this. I LOVE IT! It makes me happy." And it does. Because for 90 minutes, I don't need to think, I just need to try my very best in each moment I encounter.

But it wasn't 90 minutes, actually. My current practice is so *entirely* futz-free that I speed through all of it - the Primary and the Intermediate and the backbends - in a tidy 75 minutes. I was rereading bits of the blog from the Fall, during the 'long-difficult-lonely' era of my practice. My practice doesn't feel long at all right now, it's not hard and I'm too busy practising to feel lonely.

My shoulder still hurts sometimes, but I seem to have hit upon the magical formula that allows me to move through the series while remaining deeply connected to my breath, but backing off from any pain sensation near the site of the injury. I know exactly where that edge is and I can tip-toe around it.

The perimetre of that edge is getting smaller, though. I find myself able to do more and more. I've read that these type of injuries can take up to 12 weeks to heal. That would place my full recovery (not that this means anything; my hamstring is still 'recovering') sometime in March, the month I was *supposed* to travel north to see my teachers.

If I wanted to have some existential angst, I guess I could have it about THAT. Because I don't know if I'm going to be able to travel in March. My schedule is unclear, money is very tight. And I don't know if I *want* to go. I know that sounds vague, but I guess I'm feeling uncertain about teachers-in-general and perhaps I'm a little bit disenchanted with the Astanga tradition right now. Even as I'm feeling happy with my practice, I'm feeling very disconnected, as if I'm stuck in some kind of Astanga Limbo.

But as long as I'm on this topic, if YOU live in Montreal (in the city) and you have a couch or a floor I could sleep on for a day or two (I'm really not picky), please get in touch (I'm on google mail, username: reluctantashtangi). I'll be spending my time elsewhere (probably the Shala, maybe my friend D's gallery, and very likely myriad cafés). I just need a place to sleep from 9 p.m. to Stupid o'clock in the morning. I'm a quiet, non-demanding guest and I bake terrific muffins. If you'd like to host, get in touch.

I'm guess I'm feeling very content, but uncertain about many things in my life. And to be perfectly honest, I think all of this uncertainty is really good for me so I'm going to sit with it for awhile.



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Thoughts from the Sand Box

Wow, nothing like putting your heart on your sleeve to draw out all of the really nice people and also some of the not-so-nice ones. I appreciated the nice comments and emails. You guys are great!

But I guess I should clarify: I'm not necessarily quitting Astanga. I don't know *what* I'm going to do. I do realise that there's a culture of 'working through injuries' in this practice and I've certainly done my share of that with the hamstring injury. But this shoulder thing is a different beast all together.

I would have to love Astanga a whole LOT in order to suffer through the kind of pain and discomfort I've been experiencing lately on the mat on a longterm basis. I've spoken to other longtime practitioners and this seems to be one of those injuries that can be a permanent fixture. So it worries me.

Because I teach yoga for a living, I need to ask myself if I'm prepared to sacrifice my career for Astanga Yoga. I think the answer to that question is a rousing "NO". I think there are times when a line needs to be drawn. This is a classic 'overuse injury'. It's awful - I wouldn't wish it on anyone.

I've never sought to be the poster child for Traditional Astanga, so I'm sorry if I've disappointed anyone. But the bottom line is, this is about me. Me, me, me. And my life, my passion and my sole source of income. If the past month of 'yoga tourism' has taught me anything, it's that I can be happy without Astanga. My joy in life is not based on one particular style of yoga (though the jury is still out on whether I could be happy giving up yoga altogether).

Private to 'Anonymous':
The answer to your question is 'No.' Because this is a BLOG. Not the Bible, the Torah or any other authoritative guide. And I'm not your G-d or your mother or your guru. I'm just an ordinary woman on her own journey, who happens to share her thoughts through writing. If I decided to jump off a bridge, I'm certain you wouldn't consider doing the same. This principle also applies to the decisions I make about my Asana practice. It's time to put on your Big Girl Pants and learn to form your own opinions based on your own experience. A terrific place to being this journey is your own yoga mat. Good luck with that.

And this is for everyone:
I moderate my comments. This means that every single comment that is posted on this blog has to be approved by me *first*. If it's not nice or you're being a jerk, or you're trying to push your own agenda, I won't click 'publish'. I hope that as yoga practitioners and people of quality, we can play nicely in the sandbox with one another. But I won't host a flame war on my blog and I won't let anyone shit on me in my own space.

Please, let's practice some Ahimsa and be kind to one another. If our yoga practice isn't teaching us how to do that, I don't see what good it is.




Princess Fur, playing nice in her own 'sandbox'.

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Astanga

The universe is mocking me. I was sleepless past 2 a.m. last night with insomnia and cramps, but my LH is still MIA (I'm overloading on the acronyms here because, frankly, I'm sick of talking about it). So I got up this morning to practice: tired, sore and cranky.

My cold appears to be wrapping up, but laryngitis is following close on its heels. Believe me, this is the kiss of death for a full-time yoga teacher who offers mainly led classes. I'm scheduled to teach four classes tomorrow! I really need my voice!

And to top it all off, winter is here in full force, with snow flurries, wind chills and overcast misery. We haven't seen the sun in days. The sidewalks are gritty with salt. Even the smallest excursion outdoors chills to the bone.

Practice this morning was full Primary, which is so soothing. I love it! It's hard to start, but then it's hard not to stop. It's an easy practice for me, particularly since I'm still modifying every vinyasa. Today, I recovered my Chaturanga-to-Upward-Facing-Dog, with no pain. I can do Downward Facing Dog as long as I set it up very carefully. It's not the complete vinyasa, but it's a start.

The best news: I did Urdhva Dhanurasana today, three times, very carefully. First backbends in nearly a week!

So it's coming along, slowly but surely. I'm just trying to be patient as this difficult week crawls by. I'm keeping faith with my practice and holding on to the hope that everything will be easier in 7 days.




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Astanga

Last night was rough. I didn't sleep well because my head hurt and my sinuses were throbbing. Then, I was kept awake with horrible cramps that stayed with me until morning.

But when I rolled out of bed in the morning, my LH hadn't actually started, so I still had to get up and do my practice.

Lady's Holiday FAIL!!!

I'm still waiting, and in the meantime I'm bloated, paranoid and I can't. stop. eating. cookies. *burp* Epic PMS!

On the bright side, I actually had a very nice practice and my shoulder does feel a *bit* better. I was able to do Purvottanasana today, which made me happy because it's become one of my favourite poses. A number of other small things are back: bringing my arms overhead in Prasarita C (gently, of course), reverse-prayer-hands in Parsvottanasana, and grabbing my toes in Baddha Padmasana.

But some simple things are still tricky, notably downward facing dog and bringing my top arm alongside my ear in Parsvakonasana. I'm still modifying my vinyasas and skipping vinyasas between sides too.

I haven't bothered to even try my Intermediate poses and since I can't press up into Urdhva Dhanurasana or even put any weight into my shoulder in that position, backbends are out. I'm doing 'bridge pose' instead, hoping that I can at least strengthen my legs and work on that elusive connection between active legs and relaxed gluteals. Last time I was up at North, DR pointed out that I still I haven't nailed that.

On the even brighter side, I'm successfully fighting off the cold I picked up. A combination of ColdFX, neti pot, and vitamin C seems to be doing the trick and I haven't even brought out the oregano oil yet. As I'm writing this (on the subway home from my last class of the day, 9 p.m.), I'm feeling about 100 times better than I did in the morning.

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It's 70s Yoga Day! Here, Kareen demonstrates one method to let off some steam when you have Epic PMS.




BLAAAAARRRRRGGGH!

It's even more effective when you shake your head vigorously back and forth and flap your tongue around like a crazy lazy.

I tried it and now I only want to eat *half* the box of double chocolate vegan cookies.

I'm saving the other half for tomorrow. ;-)

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Astanga

After all of that fuss and drama yesterday, I was unprepared for my practice to be so ordinary and - dare I say it - good. I moved through at a good clip. My body seems to have adjusted to the modified vinyasas and I found myself falling into a groove. I skipped vinyasa between sides today to reduce the impact on my gimpy shoulder.

The shoulder is feeling much better! I didn't even notice any sensation until the very end of my practice. If this is any indication, I think a weekend of rest will resolve the problem. I hope so.

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Princess Fur is enjoying her new hiding place under the desk very much. All the better to supervise me as I practice!




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Astanga

The Good: Ten hours of sleep. TEN! My mid-day class cancelled, so I slept in. Till 7:30 a.m.!!! It was heavenly.

The Bad: My practice. Nearly everything about it. Today, I sunk to a new low, not only skipping backbends, but opting out of Sirsasana as well. And I didn't bother with Intermediate either. Clearly, I need to figure out some reliable substitutions for those parts of the series.

Well, the backbends anyway. I skipped Sirsasana because I had The Lazy.

I can't believe I have to do it all again tomorrow. This has been one of those weeks when my practice feels impossible. The weekend is the light at the end of my tunnel.

In the meantime...




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Astanga

Practice this morning was tough. I was paying attention to the sensations in my shoulder during every pose and transition, taking care to back off when I felt the slightest twinge. A huge number of poses, both in the Primary Series and my Intermediate, are now modified.

The whole process was mentally exhausting. Usually, my momentum carries me forward. Today, I felt like I had to bully myself through every pose. By the time I got to Pasasana (modified twist with prayer hands *sigh*), I was frustrated and spent.

On the bright side, I'm still able to do the 'lift-up' part of Vinyasa, so I've been emphasizing that and I had a few genuinely awesome 'Lolasana moments'.

I can't press into Urdhva Dhanurasana from the floor without discomfort. I have to drop back instead. I'm using the wall as a support so I can drop back with properly aligned feet. Once I'm in the pose, my shoulder doesn't hurt.

Since I was already at the wall, I worked on standing up too, walking my hands up the wall a bit, then standing. It felt really good! I'm looking forward to this part of my practice tomorrow.

It's not a great practice right now, but I feel good about moving through it and learning from the experience. I'm trying to keep positive.

This has been a challenging week. My Fall pre-reg sessions usually wrap up by now, but they've been dragging on due to earlier cancellations. They won't finish until next week. I had hoped to travel up to Montreal this week to practice with D&J, but it just wasn't possible. My next chance will be in March.

I'll just be happy to have a couple weeks of a slower schedule so I can catch my breath. I'm exhausted. Then it all starts up again in January.



(Sunset tonight, while waiting for the bus to take me to my three back-to-back classes.)

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Astanga

I've been in denial these past few days, but it looks like I need to face up: there's something going on with my right shoulder and it's not just my Gremlin talking to me.

This issue has been ongoing to a certain degree, but it's never effected my practice in a huge way until now. I started modifying parts of my practice yesterday, but today I found that even a simple movement like pushing back from Upward Dog to Downward Dog was very uncomfortable.

The pain is on the front of my shoulder, underneath the deltoid. I have to dig around a bit to palpitate it. It hurts at odd moment, like the forementioned Downward Dog, but also when I bring my arm over head in the Parvokonasanas. But it's fine in Chaturanga and even Uth Pluthi is fine (well, as 'fine' as Uth Pluthi gets, anyway).

By the end of my practice, I was modifying all vinyasas, taking out the jumps and replacing Downward Dog with table pose (hands and knees). I did a finger bind in Marichyasana D and took it easy with Prasarita C. For some reason, Supta Kurmasana was comfortable, but Pasasana wasn't even do-able. Ditto for Bhekasana and I didn't try Parsva Dhanurasana, figuring I pose that has me landing on my shoulder is probably a bad idea.

I gingerly did three Urdhva Dhanurasana, coming down to take a break between each. My shoulder was very uncomfortable pressing up from the floor, and the discomfort was enough that I was hesitant to make that additional push upward in order to bring the juicy stretch into my front hips.

Talk about taking all the joy out of my backbends!!! *sigh*

Fortunately, a Moon Day is coming up and my LH with it. I may take a break from Vinyasa-based yoga for few days and see if the shoulder issue sorts itself out. Meanwhile, ice and arnica are my friends. Demoing Downward Dog in my classes is NOT my friend.

I hope this thing resolves itself or it's really going to mess up my Big Plans for December. *sigh*




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Astanga

When the alarm went off this morning, I lay in the darkness thinking groggily: "Shala." Then I woke completely, remembered, and corrected myself: "Sweep floor!" I also put all the blinds down, which helps keep the room a bit warmer.

It worked - I was sweating buckets this morning. It was great! I had a really nice practice: strong, focused and *fun*.

The wrist bind in Mari D is easy again. Looks like it's sticking around for the time being. Yay!

Supta Kurmasana was really deep. After I exited, it occurred to me that in home practice, I'm free to come into that pose however I like! I could try the Dwi Pada Sirsasana thing, prop myself against the bookshelf to keep my balance as I get the second leg behind and hook the ankles. Hmm...

I could try it tomorrow! I'm feeling so energized and excited about my practice again. I see all these possibilities and I'm suddenly brainstorming ways I could develop specific skills in my practice.

I did Bhujapidasana twice because I wasn't entirely happy with the exit. This part of my Primary really needs some work, so I may start repeating it regularly. It's a good strength builder and it's always better on the second go.

The lotus jumpback is one of my new favourite things right now. I'm still doing the cheaty 'Mayurasana thing' with my arms, but I'm really lifting the lotus! And I can hold it up for a micropause before I shoot my legs back too. Love it!

Dropbacks were a bit shaky this morning, but I kept trying and trying and finally got through them. No luck standing up. I'm still trying to deepen my inhalation on the rocks forward.

I still need a deeper backbend and I've been thinking about hangbacks. I could do them before the dropbacks. I could try this for a few days and see if I notice a difference. I like hangbacks because I enjoy the intense stretch in my hips. They just feel good (that's reason enough to do them!).

Oh, and I'm back to doing jumpbacks/jumpthroughs after an almost-two-week hiatus to rest my right shoulder. I wasn't going all-out, but doing them gently and it felt fine.

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Astanga

Food poisoning, Day 4: The 'eat at your own peril' edition.

I seem to be fine these days unless I put anything more complicated than rice cereal or tea in my tummy.

I was feeling queasy last night, but I was fine by morning. I ate some rice cereal this morning with no ill effects, but a small plate of vegetables and tofu at lunch left me in pain for hours. *sigh*

I'm only now emerging from the fog of my wasted day. I'm glad I worked on my dropbacks in the morning and went for a walk!

When I arrived at the Shala this morning, I immediately sensed that something was amiss: No teachers. They're away for the entire week. M, the sub who covered my first week at the Shala, is here today and tomorrow. The assistant is working the rest of the week.

I was already planning to be away this weekend anyway. Depending on how my plans unfold, tomorrow may be my last Shala day this week.

It was very humid this morning and I sweated buckets during my practice. I had a good, efficient Primary - just under 90 minutes. My hamstring was feeling stiff, though.

The 'tweak' in my right shoulder is back and I felt it during the vinyasas. Initially, I wasn't going to rock in my backbends, fearing I would make it worse but I did a trial run and it was okay.

I'll be mindful of it tomorrow and if it's still bugging me, I'll 'dial down' my jumps the rest of the week during home practice.

I had one Space Cadet Moment: I skipped Utkatasana.

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Second Practice:

I waited a few hours to do this, had some breakfast, drank my tea and went for a walk. Then I was ready.

I did a shoulder opener, a hip opener and Ustrasana x3. Then, lots of Urdhva Dhanurasana with a focus on walking the hands in far and maintaining a consistent breath.

The other day, I mentioned feeling like my breath was 'stuck' in my backbends. A reader mentioned Leslie Kaminoff's book, 'Yoga Anatomy'. I grabbed my copy off the shelf: Kaminoff says that in Urdhva Dhanurasana, the body is stabilized in a 'maximal inhalation' and expanding the breathe further isn't possible.

I'm going to gently disagree. Kino addressed this in her workshop. When Udiyana Bandha is engaged in backbends, the pressure of the lock shifts the organs toward the pelvis, taking that load off of the spine, but also creating more space for expansion of the lower ribs on inhalation.

That's what I was doing today and it was totally working for me (though I'll readily agree with Kaminoff that 'relaxed breathing' is preferable).

Thanks for your comment, Markus. It helped me think through this problem!

I wasn't sure how dropbacks would feel after a four day break. I did three, one after the other, easily. What a surprise! They were amazing and...dare I say it?...FUN!!

I *never* thought I would say that about dropping back! :-D

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Astanga

I felt completely depleted after practice this morning, like the Jolly Green Giant had picked me up and rung me out like a facecloth. My clothes were soaked, my legs rubbery.

So I wasn’t thrilled when, after a long wait for the stupid streetcar, I wasn’t able to board because no one was moving back (there was plenty of room). Out of blue, I heard a clear voice ring out, no-nonsense and authoritative: “All passengers please move to the back of the streetcar to accommodate those boarding!” And like a herd of sleepy sheep, people DID move back and I was able to get on.

The guy boarding behind me nudged my arm and said “Nice going!” And that’s when I realised that the authoritative voice was me! In my exhaustion and frustration I had totally conjured up my Yoga Teacher Voice, the same one I use when I direct 25 students in a gymnasium to stand-up-and-come-to-the-top-of-your-mat-Samasthiti. I was barely aware, I was so clobbered by practice.

I was sweating BUCKETS today. I know I shouldn’t be complaining. It’s not even close to being *really* hot or humid yet, but I was DYING in there this morning. If this is a foreshadowing of the State-of-the-Shala in summer, I’ll need to adjust to the heavy, dense heat and anticipate VERY sweaty practices. I should have drank a few more glasses of water before I hit the mat. I’m already anticipating the purchase of a new ‘Shala uniform’ that is more heat-friendly. Thank goodness I’m losing this extra weight because I’ll probably be in tiny shorts and a sports bra by August, modesty be damned.

I had another Space Cadet Day. I’m going to blame the heat because it makes me feel better. I skipped Purvottanasana, but didn’t remember it until I was on the streetcar home. Inexplicably, I skipped Marichyasana B, my favourite pose (though lately it’s been feeling wonky on the right side). I went back and picked it up and repeated C, because I knew R would be on my case if I didn’t. I was kind of dreading that repeat, but it actually felt great on the second try.

Marichyasana D was tough today - no wrist bind there. Supta Kurmasana was fun! R waited for me to bind and cross my ankles on my own, then she rearranged my legs and let me come up mostly on my own (and then my sweaty legs slid down my sweaty arms, making any kind of graceful exit impossible).

Predictably, my arms and shoulders are tired today. I was really getting lazy with my lift-ups and jumpbacks. My right shoulder is very twingy - not sure what’s going with that. It’s not really pain, but a soreness on the front inside edge of the deltoid. It feels deep. If anyone has ideas, please comment.

Teacher R decided that today would be a perfect day for Urdhva Dhanurasana Bootcamp! She parked herself next to my mat as I was setting up for backbends. The first one was agony and the next two were a bit better, but still difficult. Backbend #4 had me walking my hands in and engaging my legs until I was shaking, R let me come down to the floor for a rest (that was merciful: usually I rest my head on the floor and come right back up). The last backbend was insanely difficult, but in a different way. I was just working very, very hard. I walked my hands in for what felt like miles (but was very likely centimetres).

It’s lucky I don’t spend too much time thinking about how hard this practice is when I’m not doing it. If I did that, I’d probably *never* be able to coax myself to the Shala six days a week. Instead, I remind myself about the parts I like: the amazing energy of the room, the confident support of the teachers, quietly chanting the opening and closing chants, squishes in forward bends, favourite adjustments and taking rest at the end.