Too much candy makes you sick

Wow, am I ever tired of the never-ending, when-will-it-die discussion of Scant Yoga Clothing. Just when I thought it was finally over for good, it popped up again in the blogosphere this week, just like an annoying relative who doesn't know when to leave.

Hey, Short Shorts! You've outstayed your welcome. Now scurry along and don't let the door smack you on your exposed buttcheeks.

I swear, I'm going to buy a pair of those miniscule shorts, then wear them the next time I go to Shala North and scare all my friends. Trust me, I'm NOT a person who should be wearing tiny shorts. My yoga shorts resemble granny-panties for good reason: I'm no longer twenty years old!

(although, I have to admit - the gentlemen pictured above are TOTALLY pulling it off!)

A few words about my practice...

I've been maintaining a 5-day practice schedule of Astanga. This week, I did my full practice (Primary, first 8 Intermediate poses) on Saturday, Monday, Tuesday and Thursday and went to a Bikram class on Wednesday. Tonight, I went to an evening Vinyasa class too, so I'm bone-exhausted.

I had a funny moment in the class tonight. All week, I've been teaching Galavasana in my classes, carefully chopping the pose into managable 'phases' so the beginning students won't feel too overwhelmed and I've also demo'ed the full pose for my students.

It's interesting the way this posture has popped up over the course of the week. I ran across a magazine article about the pose, then a friend who's fairly new to yoga wrote a FB status about learning the pose. Between hearing about it, reading about it, doing it and teaching it, by the end of the week, I was feeling pretty Galavasana'ed out.

As I headed to class this evening, I was thinking what a privilege it was to go to a class taught by a colleague and experience yoga as a student: "This is awesome! 90 whole minutes of 'me time' and fun vinaysa!" And almost as an afterthought: "I won't have to do Galavasana! Yay!"

Guess what the arm balance was tonight? Yup! What are the odds? This week, the universe was giving me more Galavasana than I could handle. I was so tired, I could barely manage it tonight! I totally tanked. My Bandhas said 'uncle'.

I'm SO glad I have the weekend off. Tomorrow, I'll practice Primary. With the Moon Day on Saturday and my regular rest day on Sunday, I'll have a two-day vacation from Astanga, though I may do a bit of vinyasa yoga.

Or I may not. Maybe I'll just sleep in! ;-)

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

When things fall apart

I know, I know...I've been *really* quiet lately.

February is a bare-bones-survival month. I just try to do the essentials, focus on stuff that absolutely needs to be attended to. Accomplishing anything extra feels like a major coup. This weekend, I visited the Grumpy Russian Guy and got my hair cut AND I gave Princess Fur her spring haircut. I also did the laundry. I felt like someone should give me a medal after all that, but no such luck. So I made brownies instead.

I *have* been practising, though sometimes it takes superhuman effort just to get on the mat. Here's a recap of the past week-and-a-bit:

Friday (this is WAY back, the Friday before last): I went to Cashew's noon hot class. I sometimes call Cashew 'Echo' because she does this thing in Savasana were she gives a relaxation cue, then echos herself till it fades off. This always makes me giggle (which isn't very relaxing, but I never stick around for Savasana after hot yoga anyway). Afterwards, I went out for sushi. Hot yoga does something to food. The lunch special is never *that* great, but after the class, it tasted SUBLIME.

I'm giving the Bad Energy Meditation Group another go (I returned last month and it wasn't so bad; the crazy lady is gone and the group is under 'new management', although Crazy Lady's apparently going around calling herself our 'spiritual director' now, which is kind of creepy). I ended up having a fantastic time with the group and even going out afterward...for Indian food...at 10 p.m. Wild! Usually I'm in bed at that time of night, so it was funny to be out and eating. I woke up the next morning with a full belly, so Saturday turned into a day off.

That's okay, though, because a nearby studio was offering free vinyasa classes over the holiday weekend. I went to the Sunday evening class, excited and full of enthusiasm but it was big disappointment; the instructor was HORRIBLE. I was shocked, given that she's a regular teacher at this location.

The Monday class was a rush to get to because it was right after my noon class, but I managed to arrive with 10 minutes to spare. Good thing I did, because the room was PACKED! (Interestingly, I ended up next to another Ashtangi) After the bad experience on Sunday, I went into the class a bit more skeptical, but I had a better experience with this instructor. I learned a helpful shoulder stretch - my shoulder injury seems to be at a point where it's tightening up as it heals so this will be useful.

All of this yoga tourism had a result I hadn't anticipated: it renewed my confidence in my own teaching and reminded me of the things that work for me (and don't work for me) as a student: Clear instruction, minimal chit-chat, logical sequencing, cues that emphasize alignment and movement of energy in the body. All of these things are basics, but they're key - it gave me good food for thought and some insight into what I want to emphasize in my own teaching.

On Tuesday morning, I returned to my full Astanga practice at home. I had a pretty good practice, though my hamstrings were tight. The gimpy shoulder was feeling significantly better (I did Urdhva Dhanurasana a few times in the weekend classes and it was feeling pretty good). I did held three UD for five breath cycles, no pain!

I went to Peanut's Wednesday morning hot class. Peanut was awesome, as usual, but I had a bad class. My balance was completely off! Half-way through the class, I got a 'flash headache' that plagued me through the seated poses, but as soon as the class was over, it was gone.

On Thursday, I woke up in a deep funk and didn't want to practice at all. I was tired, I was grumpy. I was scheduled to do my full practice. Instead, I sulked in bed and finally lured myself to the mat with a promise that I only had to do the Suryas and fundamental standing poses with finishing. I thought maybe I would be inspired to do more, but noooo...I wasn't. I grumped through it and rolled up my mat.

The reason for my ennui revealed itself the next morning: My LH arrived early. I rested on Friday and Saturday, but this morning I did a 40-minute vinyasa practice (YogaDownload, Yoga for Runner's #1 with Dawnelle). I'm hoping this will ease my return to my Astanga practice tomorrow because right now, I'm *dreading* it.

********************
On Thursday, after my sulky practice, I pulled out my beloved guitar, thinking some music would cheer me up, only to find that ALL the strings were lose. The ENTIRE bridge had detached from the body.

I was dismayed, given that this is my 'dream guitar', the $900 Alvarez that I paid off for months in lay away. It was supposed to last my lifetime. This is a major repair (I learned later that it's covered under the warranty).


I think it's an apt symbol of a month gone bad, when things were falling apart all around me and I felt constantly overwhelmed.

- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Intention, meet Action!

Last week in one of my youth classes, a new student arrived - a little boy. He's around six years old. He asked if he *had* to take his shoes off. I confirmed that he must, so he carefully removed them, then unrolled the mat I gave him and sat down, cross-legged.

He looked me in the eye and said, very earnestly: "I'd like to learn how to fart in my own face."

I've never had a student more clearly state their intention for taking yoga practice.

Without skipping a beat, I replied: "Well, yoga can help you with that!" And I got him started on preparatory poses for Tittibhasana B.








(photo credit: Arjuna's wonderful website Ashtangayoga.info)

I'm sure DR and Miss Stan will be happy to know that the yoga mats they donated to my childrens' yoga programme are being put to such GREAT use, helping the next generation of Ashtangis to develop *ahem* important life skills!

;-D

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The end of week always feels very 'yoga-heavy' to me because I go to Pine Nut's Friday night hot class and go to bed almost immediately after coming home. Then I get up the next morning to do my Astanga practice. Yoga, yoga!

Last night's class was fun! As usual, the room was incredibly hot. These Friday night classes are very different from the morning classes I'm used to attending. The room is packed and there's a jolly atmosphere, like someone's having a party.

That 'someone' is Pine Nut, the teacher. His dialogue is energetic and fun and he keeps us all laughing. The sheer mass of people gives the room a bright, intense energy. And there are always a good number of brand new people which is SO MUCH FUN to watch and listen to. Hilarious!

Oh, and by the way, I'm not the only one bestowing nicknames at Hot Central. Actually, there seems to be a culture of nicknames in the hot yoga world (during teacher training, Bikram himself called poor Peanut "Bald Man"...lol).

My nickname appears to be...wait for it..."Miss Astanga".

Yo! REPRESENT!

I think I'm going to get one of those big ribbons to put across my chest - you know, the kind "Miss Universe" wears. :-D

I expected to have a difficult practice last night because it was SO hot, but I didn't. In fact, I had a terrific practice and nailed every single pose. All of my balances were solid, I brought my forehead to my knee in Dandayamana-Janusirsasana on both sides (first time!) and I held toe-stand on both sides.

Contrast this to last Wednesday's class, when the room was a more moderate temperature, yet I was suffering throughout the entire class. I always assumed my good and bad days in the hot room could be explained by temperature fluctuations. Turns out, just like in my Astanga practice, they're really influenced by ME (and, more than likely, my silly brain).

Good to know!

I really enjoyed my Astanga practice this morning. I moved through my Primary and 8 Intermediate poses, futz-free in 75 minutes. This still amazes me. I can still remember last summer when I couldn't get through Primary in under 90 minutes and it was sometimes nearly two hours.

My shoulder felt better today. No pain at all! (but I was backing well away from any transition that caused discomfort).

The highlight of my practice today was Sirsasana. I'm feeling strong in that pose and I think I may be ready to start extending my hold to a couple of minutes again.









- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

Astanga

I’m SO ready for the Moon Day. Due to a scheduling hiccup, it looks like I’m going to have nearly an entire day off tomorrow (only one class to teach!). I can sleep in and have The Lazy all day If I want to!

But I don’t know if I really want to. To be perfectly honest, I’m ready to be busy again. Late summer is a notoriously slow time for yoga teachers. Sometimes I wish I could just bottle up all this free time for use in the winter months, when I’m endlessly busy and trudging from class to class through enormous piles of grey slush (and I would also like to bottle up some of the money I make during the winter months so I could go shopping NOW!).

Also: I seem to manage my time much better when I don’t have a lot of it. Anyone else have this problem?

********************

I had a good practice this morning, once I got around to it. I woke up reasonably early but there was no hot water in my building (AGAIN! This is a recurring problem. Argh). I was out of Epsom salts anyway, but I really wanted that hot bath before I hit the mat. I waited around hopefully, thinking perhaps the problem would resolve itself, but it never did (Read: cold bath after practice. Brrr!)

I finally unrolled my mat at 8:30 and got started. I was feeling a bit off-kilter today, like my body was out of balance. This feeling didn’t ease until I started Intermediate postures (though Utthita Hasta Padangusthasana was strong and stable - go figure).

Something is going on in Supta Kurmasana. The wrist binds are solid in my Marichyasanas, but lately I’ve had to really squiggle around to bind fingers in Supta K. And my ankles are not crossing easily either. This is a big mystery to me. Am I getting too plump? Are my hips tightening up?

Lately, I’ve been doing some hip openers in the evening - Yin Yoga - to counter some of the stiffness that’s probably being caused by Laghu Vajrasana. I was hoping this would help. Nope!

I had a re-epiphany of sorts during backbending today. I did my three Urdhva Dhanurasana, dropped back three times and then dropped back to the futon and tried to stand up.

*sigh* I was really struggling. After a particularly comedic crash-landing back to the futon, I sat down and thought it though.

I was pretty sure part of the problem was my breathing. When I’m struggling with something, I go into a panic state and I start breathing very shallowly , especially my inhalations.

Solution: Take some time after the dropback to find a deep and steady breath - especially the inhalation - and co-ordinate the breath with my rocks before trying to stand up.

I also observed that I seemed to have lost my connection to the ‘mechanics’ of rocking. I was just throwing myself forward randomly and not specifically moving *my hips* forward. As a result, I was kind of ‘flailing’ as I stood up and often twisting around and falling backwards. I needed to focus more on leading with my hips and engaging that same connection with my legs that I make when coming up from Laghu Vajrasana.

I put it all together and dropped back, took five slow, deep breaths and started rocking my hips forward, engaging my legs strongly on every inhalation. The really beautiful thing is, it actually WORKED! I stood up with grace and control. Hooray!

This is definitely one of those times when I had to take a step back from my practice and become my own teacher. I needed to analyze what wasn’t working then find a solution, with the right cues to talk myself through it. This is hard to do when I’m feeling panicked and miserable, worried that I’ve lost something that was easy just days before.

I literally had to ‘shut off’ the irrational, whiny part of my brain, then ask myself “If one of your students was having this same problem, what would you look for? How would you troubleshoot the action? What would you tell her?” This stuff is really hard to do in the moment, but I think it makes me a better teacher as well as a stronger practitioner.

This is one of the reasons new yoga teachers are always told that it’s essential to maintain your own practice if you plan to teach others. I fully agree. I’m a better teacher because I’m on the mat every day. My practice is part of my teaching and my teaching is part of my practice.

Vinyasa

A while back, a read a post somewhere about 'the yoga teacher voice'. The writer was wondering why? Why talk in that funny, faux-soothing, smooth, new-agey, yoga voice while teaching? Why do teachers do it? (confession: I do it too!).

Today, I had my answer: It actually adds a necessary element to the class. Used in moderation, it adds character.

Technically, there was nothing wrong with the 30 minute Power Yoga #1 sequence I did today. I liked the poses, I liked the flow, I liked the sequencing. Even the timing was perfect.

But it was too perfect. It was almost like a radio news-reader was leading the class.

Jamie's voice was bland and slightly monotone. It was almost as if she was reading off a script (which I kind of suspect she was!). I'm going to take a while guess here and speculate that this was one of the first 'prototype classes' for YogaDownload - they hadn't quite perfected their technique.

This was a good class, but it wasn't a great one. It was technically perfect, but had no character.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but what it needed was a dash of good, old-fashioned, new-age flakiness. It needed some 'yoga teacher voice'.

I had a good practice though, and it was exactly the right amount of yoga to fit into this busy day. I teach today, then I'm meeting up with the girlfriend for a nice dinner out followed by the Festival of Lights parade to celebrate the Solstice. We're also exchanging our gifts tonight. I already know what I'm getting: socks and the latest DVD set for Grey's Anatomy.

No doubt, we'll lay around watching DVDs and eating chocolate until the wee hours!

Vinyasa

My body was sore and stiff this morning, plus my lower back was cranky. I started my practice with the intention of doing half-Primary but ended up just moving through the sun salutations and standing poses then moving right into Savasana. CONK!

That's all I had in me (and, as it turns out, all I had time for). It was an unremarkable practice, one of those that I'm just happy to have behind me...moving on!

Today has been dull, but insanely productive. My small victories include cleaning the bathroom and scrubbing the floors, teaching one class, spending too much money at the grocery store, then discovering that that a cheque from a client *bounced* (Boing! Boing! Thanks for the warning, people! Boo!) It's a good thing I put extra money in that account, but Christmas is now looking a tad grim. I hope I get they pay up soonish.

In terms of my schedule, the Yoga Gods are being SO good to me: I'm adding a private this month which may carry into the New Year and all of my current classes are schedule to continue into January.

And update on the Princess:
Princess Fur is doing very well! She's almost completely recovered from her little encounter with the dental scaler and her gums are healing nicely from the extractions. Last night, she asked to come up on the futon while I was reading and then slept next to my leg for the better part of the night (She always jumps down after a while; I can only guess that I snore, fart or kick in my sleep - or maybe all three!)

Anyway, I think she's finally forgiven me!

Project Doggie Dental 2010 has already started in earnest: I'm brushing her teeth both in the a.m. and p.m., daily. I'll start bi-weekly treatments with the tartar control gel next week once her gums have healed up.

I'm also adding vitamin C to her food. I smoosh up the tablets with a spoon to create a white powder and add half of it to her supper. Anyone who saw it in my kitchen might raise an eyebrow, but believe me, no one's getting high off *this* stuff. The vitamin C is supposed to bring the pH of her urine back into balance. I've also heard rumours that it eliminates brown stains on the beard. That would be nice. I'm curious to see if this works.

My dog is extremely well cared for. As my girlfriend frequently points out, Princess Fur gets a LOT of attention. More attention *ahem* than some of the humans in my life. :-D

Vinyasa

The moon looked pretty full last night! People were acting weird around the city. Weirdness in the subway, weirdness on the street, weirdness in my classes. And, predictably, the little kids in my afternoon class were bat-shit-crazy-NUTS. I decided to go along with it and came up with a CRAZY yoga class for them.

First, we ran around in circles screaming our heads off as we personified the Gunas. Screaming and running represented 'Rajas', falling dramatically to the floor in (fake; believe me, for the, it was fake) exhaustion was 'Tamas' and skipping around happily with goofy grins portrayed 'Sattva'.

Then we played this game where they ran around pell-mell until I shouted the name of a pose. As soon as every child was in that pose, I yelled RUN! And they did, until I called the next pose. This developed into a game of tag, where I couldn't shout the name of the next pose until I had personally 'tagged' every single child.

As we ran around, one little boy shouted with joy: "This is the best yoga EVER!" A future Ashtangi for sure!! :-D

By the end of the class, we were ALL exhausted.

My plan last night was to go to sleep early, as soon as I got back from my evening class. That didn't happen. I couldn't sleep because my next door neighbour decided to have a party. I live in an apartment building with *thick* walls so if I can hear noise through them, it's something seriously loud. There was this one woman who's voice was SO loud and piercing the I could hear EVERY word she was saying.

They sang the 'Happy Birthday' song half a dozen times, louder each time. Finally, the only thing that could drown them out (I didn't have any earplugs) was my noise reduction headphones coupled with brown noise on the iPod. I fell asleep but I think my sleep must have been affected because I've been tired all day. I laid down for a few minutes before lunch and I was asleep before my head hit the pillow.

Practice this morning was easy and mercifully short. I did a YogaDownload class, Hip Opening Flow #2 with Lisa, 45 minutes. I know I've said before, I really like this particular sequence. Today, I noticed how much I like the music and that's not always true of the YogaDownload classes.

I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed by how quickly this day is speeding by and how little I've really accomplished. I'm also floored by the arrival of December (Seriously, is this year really approaching an end *already*?). I can't believe my pre-reg classes are ending.

On the bright side, this will give me some much-needed downtime going into the New Year.

Hatha

The power came back in the afternoon yesterday, but the hot water was out until early evening. I finally toughed it out and took a sponge bath (brrr!), then ran my errands. It wasn't a bad day at all - it just unfolded differently than I thought it would.

I rode public transit to the Big Box Pet Store in the north-east end of the city. I almost never shop there but they carry those big wire dog crates. Princess Fur is fully crate-trained, almost to a fault: she howls like her heart is broken if I *don't* crate her when I leave.

She's had the same breed-appropriate travel crate for years but it seems so small. I know all she does is sleep when I'm away, but I wanted her to have more elbow room. I tried out her new 'Doggie Condo' (it was incredibly simple to construct, took mere seconds - Ikea, eat your heart out!). I can crawl into it and close the door (okay, in Balasana, but *still*) so I think it's big enough!

The rest of the day was dedicated to 'lazy'. I took a blissful nap in the afternoon, then knitted rows on my green sock. It's beginning to look like something substantial now and that's very exciting!

I'm discovering that I'm more of a 'process knitter' than an 'end product knitter'. I enjoy the repetitive flow of knitting; the meditative aspect. The fact that something useful emerges in the end is great, but it's the journey that makes me happy. I think I may become one of those psycho-sock-knitters. Now that I have the hang of it, I'm loving socks.

This morning, I eased back into my morning routine, slightly modified to account for the fact that we're *still* on Daylight Savings Time and it's very dark in the mornings. I'm envious of the Brits and Europeans who already 'fell back' this past weekend. It was too dark to go for a walk, so I practised yoga after my meditation, ate breakfast, then walked. My morning felt churned up, but it worked out okay. In fact, this may be my new schedule going into winter.

For my yoga practice, I followed Gentle Hatha Flow #2, 60 minutes with Jackie. The 60 minute version of this practice feels more 'complete' than the 45 minute one - I think I prefer it. I almost did a Yin practice this morning, but I'm glad I did something more active. I'll be back to vinyasa style tomorrow.

I chuckled with sympathy when I heard Jackie make one of my own infamous cueing errors. Going from Downward Dog to Forward Bend, the cue should convey stepping the left foot to join the right at the front of the mat. She said: “Step your left foot back to join your right” Oops! Step back to step forward? (sounds like my life some of the time! ha, ha).

I still remember blurting out this silly cue during my first year of teaching. The chaos that resulted left a deep impression on me.

Words really do matter.

Hatha

Tired, slept in this morning and it felt good. After I walked the dog, I did a 30 minute yoga practice from YogaDownload, Detox Yoga #2 with Natalie. It was so bad, I don't know if I'll bother trying any of the longer sequences for this particular class, which is a shame because this is one of the few that is offered in a 70 minute format.

My biggest complaints are the really bad sequencing and horrible cueing. Both made it difficult to follow the practice. Several times I came into Balasana in frustration so I could listen and figure out where the heck she was going.

The music was awful. I know this is a matter of taste, but it ranged from 'powder puff soft rock' to 'tribally inspired soft jazz' (think 'Yanni goes to a rave' and you'll be on the right track). I don't like Natalie's voice - again, a matter of personal preference. I found her style of speaking very 'info-mercial'. Her pacing was erratic - at times speaking slowly and clearly (good) while at other times speaking very quickly and slurring her words together (not good).

She used names for poses that I had never heard before. I've been practising yoga for 15 years around the world, so I was surprised. For example: Standing Splits. She referred to it as 3-limbed Uttanasana and I was all, “Huh?!” And there were others. I think she called Parsvokonasana “Extended Lateral Angle”. Weird...

I was struck by how few postures were offered in the 30 minute sequence, given how much she was talking. There wasn't enough good instruction to let me know what was going on and at the same time, it wasn't concise enough.

Finally, I was horrified by some of the 'advanced' variations she suggested. A few were valid, but she clearly 'invented' a couple of them and one of them ('Challenge Dog') is dangerous to the shoulder (rotator cuff) and I would *never* ask my students to do it. The transitions were choppy and poorly thought out (this was more of a Hatha class than a 'Flow'). For example, the entry into Ardha Matsyendrasana was so bad, I had to come out of the pose and come back in *my* way to align my spine.

As a teacher, I've learned some great stuff from these audio classes. Overall, I think the instructors are good and doing these classes has helped me clean up my cueing a lot. The one positive from this class is I spent 30 minutes experiencing how *not* to teach yoga. I'll be analyzing my own classes so I can avoid these mistakes.

Vinyasa

Oh yay, the first of the month. Rent day. *gulp*

If my cocyx wasn't already tucked between my legs, it would be. I had to borrow money from the dog to make rent. Yeah, the dog has her own special savings account (alas, not in her name) for emergency vet bills. It's quite a fall from grace, hitting up my miniature schnauzer up for rent money. Good thing business is picking up. I'll pay her back next week.

I'm teaching four classes again today. So far, I'm taking the shift to a busier teaching schedule in stride. In past years, I've been absolutely exhausted during the start of my fall sessions and very sore. Not this year. I think I have daily yoga practice to thank for my new endurance. Weirdly, my biceps were touchy this morning and my left latissimus dorsi was tender, but that's about it. I'm not overly tired, though I do feel a tad over-scheduled.

For yoga practice this morning, I did 5 Surya Namaskara A, 3 B, and then the 20 minute Balancing Flow #1 with Jamie from YogaDownload. I prefer Dawnelle's instruction over Jamie's - I find Jamie a bit stilted and bland. But the sequence was fun. It has most of my favourite one-leggers: Gorudasana, Ardha Chandrasana, Virabhadrasana III and the unique YogaDownload invention, 'Airplane'. I felt it all my hips.

In other news, I'm slimming back down to 'fighting weight' again. I've been more-or-less practising Calorie Restriction. The qualifier is there because I haven't been logging foods on a daily basis. Instead, I've been keeping a pretty consistent, interesting-to-me daily menu, mostly-vegan, focusing on whole foods.

Mother Hen will be delighted to know that I've reintroduced breakfast: old fashioned oatmeal with raisins, cinnamon and honey. Lunch is the main meal: a big plate of veggies, an egg white wrap on a whole wheat flax tortilla with hummus and flax lavash crackers on the side. For supper, I go light. I eat a plate of fresh fruit, dried fruit and raw nuts (usually almonds). This is enough to carry me to through to bedtime without feeling hungry.

It seems to be working. My pants are beginning to fit again. That's all I wanted.

Vinyasa

Today, I did Power Vinyasa Flow #1 with Dawnelle, the 45 minute version. With this class, I really noticed the spots where they 'cut' things out to make the session shorter. The Prasaritas with tripod headstand were gone, but there was still a cue for Prasarita (which then led to a Toppling Tree pose). Back and forth and back and forth. Not a big deal, but a bit confusing.

So, no inversions in this sequence, which is fine because my Lady's is imminent. I noticed that the intensity wasn't necessarily higher in this shorter version (as I've noticed it being in other 'short' versions of these YogaDownload classes). All in all, it was good. I think the 60 minute version of this class may be my favourite so far. 'Advanced Intermediate' level seems to be working for me.

My entire day was just slightly bizarre. Gmail was down in the morning, which means I couldn't check to see if I had a noon class (and the students who were emailing to ask about that noon class were not getting any answers). Gmail eventually rose from the ashes and there *was* a noon class.

My afternoon youth class almost always runs (and full too, lately I've had upwards of 16 children in that one). But only one person showed up for my evening class in the park. I had to cancel it. I guess it's too cold (to be honest, it really *was* too cold). That's it for outdoor classes. I'm putting the early Saturday morning class on hiatus until we can move indoors.

This knitting project I'm working on is making me crazy. I had to rip out several rows twice in the morning, only to mess the whole thing up again in the afternoon and then discover I was doing it wrong in the evening. Rip, rip, rip. At least I'm getting good at backtracking. It's all one step forward, two steps back. Someday, I'll have a hat. Someday.

Hatha

Today is my birthday! It's also a heavy teaching day for me - I had four classes to lead. I like teaching on my birthday, though. It's fun to tell the students and see their eyes widen.

In the youth class I teach at a private school the children broke into a rousing rendition of 'Happy Birthday to You!' and we danced around wildly to the tune. Then they all tried to guess how old I am. “You're 17!” “You're 50!” (when I asked her to guess again, she asked shyly, “Older?” and I laughed and groaned). One of my older students got it - she remembered: “You're 39!”

And I am. But I don't feel 39. I feel like I'm still in my early 30s. I have a feeling that 40 is going to take me by surprise. How did I get here?

Practice was a mixture of Hatha and a lot of backbends. I've been thinking a lot about backbends and how differently they feel for me from day to day. Today was a bad backbend day, but I decided to just experience the stiffness and tension and explore it with my breath. Survey says: Yuck.

Hatha

I taught a kids class in the afternoon and did my practice right before, so it felt like my practice kind of segued into the class itself. That's always fun because we play a lot of games, which reminds me how much fun it is to occasionally bring my practice into a place of 'playfulness'.

I did lots and lots of standing poses, a few handstands and spent more time than usual in shoulderstand.

I'm going through one of my 3-second-Savasana phases, where I can't stand to stay in a the resting pose for very long. I'm sure this is tied to my non-existent meditation practice, but I'm not worrying about it for now. I'm carrying about as many worries as I can handle at the moment.

Astanga

Happy St. Patrick's Day! I celebrated by wearing a green necklace to the class. Practice was the short form and I played around with drop backs against the wall.

I taught one of my young students how to drop back today and it occurred to me how ironic it is that I can give all this great advice and guidance on how to drop back, but I still can't do it on my own. It's embarrassing. Part of it is due to an inflexible spine - I've never been bendy. Of course, there only one remedy to that: more back bends. But I hate them.

Really, really, hate.

It's so much easier to do the stuff I like - strength stuff like handstands and arm balances. Of course, I didn't previously enjoy hand stand either. It came with practice.

Harumpf!

Hatha

Today was pretty eventful. In the morning, I made a triumphant return to my Saturday class, which has been on hiatus since October. I really missed it. I started teaching this group five years ago, until the club we were at went bankrupt. The class moved to a nearby tennis club, which finally closed when the city refused to renew its lease.

We finally found a lovely new space for the class in the basement meeting room of a community co-op. We had a wonderful class and I'm optimistic that this little yoga community will come back together again.

I taught a gentle hatha class with hip openers and enjoyed it so much that I came home and did the same sequence for myself. Then I headed out into the sunshine for a long walk with the dog - our first walk to the Big Park this year. The weather is amazing right now and it looks like we'll enjoying it for the entire weekend.

Astanga

I'm starting to settle back into a routine here at home and today I managed to pin myself down to the mat for a good hour and do the full primary series. I used the Sharath CD to keep myself on track and my practice felt really good.

My survival strategy today was simple: keep busy. Also, things have a way of working themselves out. It's not an easy time in history to be a full-time yoga teacher. I'm working on a few strategies to expand my yoga business and stay afloat over the summer.

As difficult as things have been, it's definitely roused me from my happy complacence of depending wholly on word-of-mouth to expand my business. In the long run, I think that the outreach and marketing work I'm doing now will bring me great success, particularly once the economy recovers. I'm not giving up!

Day 320

My Fall teaching schedule kicked in this week and today I'm teaching four classes. I practised yoga in the morning, managing to squeeze in an hour before leaving to teach my noon class.

I had a sweaty, sore practice. Yes, still feeling sore. I'm also still plagued by lower back spasms, but find that doing cat/dog tilts between poses helps to ease tension in my low back. Today, the spasms didn't hit until I started the seated poses, which makes me suspect that forward bending (and tight hammies) is the culprit. I was too exhausted at the end to do a proper closing sequence or headstand. I'm not yet doing Urdhva Dhanurasana - the very idea is incomprehensible.

It will be interesting to see how I feel after teaching three more classes tonight. I'm looking forward to teaching, but I'm a bit worried about my endurance. I've been walking with the dog every day (my usual 45 minute walk) and my diet is much, much better. I'm back to CR and I'm able to eat vegetables again (for a short time after my illness, I had an aversion to everything except toast and white rice).

In general, my energy levels are lower than usual and I often feel tired. I usually try to nap in the late morning or early afternoon. The other day, I slept 11 hours overnight and still fell into a deep sleep for two hours in the afternoon. I never sleep this much! It's almost comical!

I teach four more classes tomorrow. I'm already looking forward to Friday - I don't have anything scheduled on that day and I plan to lay around with a book and snooze!

Day 5

I took a day off yesterday because my menstrual symptoms were so intense. Apparently, a break was exactly what I needed because my arms and shoulders were not as sore and I felt stronger. In fact, I did Chaturanga Dandasana throughout the entire practice - or at least until Mari D. I stopped the practice there because I was tired and couldn't do the inversions because of my cycle.

I was thinking afterward that I could have done more Surya Namaskara A and Surya Namaskara B to get a better sweat going. Next time I practise, I may 'rewind the DVD' and do the sun salutation sequence again to challenge myself and warm my body.

I can feel (and see!) myself getting stronger from this practice. My arms are becoming more muscular and I feel like I'm becoming more lean, though it doesn't seem like I'm losing any weight. I think it may be that I'm just firming up muscularly. One big benefit I've noticed after only a week of doing this is that long hours of teaching are less exhausting. I've already started to build some stamina.

Found out the other day that H is taking the summer off. I'm still feeling disappointed. I was really enjoying her classes and learning a lot from them, but this also reinforces my decision to practice the Ashtanga every day. Interesting how things work out!

I enjoyed her class. One element of vinyasa-style Hatha that really resonates with me if the great variety from class to class. We did our usual vinyasa flow and a sequence of standing poses: Utthita Trikonasana .. Ardha Chandrasana .. Virabhadrasana II .. Parsvakonasana.

Also worked on Half Lotus Toe Balance (don't know the sanskrit name for it), Padangustasana, and we did a neat variation onUstrasana against the wall. I did Sirsasana even though my menstrual bleeding is about to start (figured it would be my last for a few days). Great class. I was getting used to the new space and really appreciating H's teaching. Perhaps I can revisit her class when she returns in September.