Monday, July 27, 2009

Astanga

I don't what's going on with me, but I'm not starting the week on a positive note. I was grumpy all morning, felt tired and run down by the time I got home. I couldn't motivate myself, so I curled up on the futon instead and finished Braincandy Novel #2. Then I unrolled my mat to practice.

My plan was the full Primary Series and I started enthusiastically enough. But about half-way through the standing poses, I started sobbing and I couldn't stop. I cried through the first few seated poses, then calmed down a bit.

After I knocked over a glass of water coming into the second side of Marichyasana B, I burst into tears again. I cried right up until the very last pose.

It was instructive. Among other things, I discovered, that it's difficult to maintain Ujjayi breathing while crying. It's actually hard to cry in Supta Konasana and Halasana (probably something about the diaphragm being constricted). Something about forward bends made me cry harder.

I calmed down during the closing sequence and felt rather peaceful in Savasana. I guess I needed a good cry. About 90% of this can probably be explained by massive PMS (Lady's was supposed to be here days ago), the other 10% is just Stuff that's come up in the past week (look for an update in KD soonish).

I took a long bath and headed to my guitar lesson, which cheered me up a lot. I haven't been practising regularly, but the lesson was fun. I need to get back on that wagon, because I really enjoy the guitar, find it very meditative.

And speaking of meditation, I've fallen off that wagon too. Already. But there's hope! I discovered a new Meditation iPod application. I know, I know. You're thinking: another geek toy...but this is COOL! It not only *times* the sessions, but it keeps *statistics*. I'll be held accountable!

Now I just need to meditate!

2 comments:

Michelle said...

Aw. I send a big hug.

Bhaktiyogin said...

It really sounds like you had a pretty "cathartic" practice. Congratulations.

Let it go, then come back and do it again tomorrow.
Best,
Bhakti